Happily Ever After?

Dating Culture

Be careful what you wish for

Most young women have grown up hearing the phrase “a fairy-tale wedding” or a “fairy-tale ending”. We all know what this refers to walking into the sunset with our prince charming and living our best lives with the love of our life. However, has anyone ever thought about how none of these fairy tales were peaches and cream until the ending? What I mean is each Disney story I can recall they all went through some daunting task in order to achieve this euphoric and romantic ending. Like as pictured above The Princess and the Frog. Tiana was on the brink of losing her restaurant and then went through a whole ordeal of being turned into a frog alongside the prince. It wasn’t until they realized their love for each that they returned to human form and married. In Cinderella, the princess initially was subject to the bullying and belittling from her stepmother and stepsisters. Once she was granted a wish from her fairy godmother, we see her transform into a beautiful princess once she meets the prince and falls in love. However, she must return at midnight and rushes home and in the process loses her glass slipper. Then, the prince goes through various women trying to find the owner of the glass slipper. After all of that, they finally reconnect and live happily ever after.

Love takes time

I used to be envious of fairy tales but breaking down the process of what their love had to overcome makes me realize that it takes time and patience. I am also guilty of spending time scrolling on Facebook and Instagram and feeling that tinge of jealousy when yet another friend becomes engaged or looks so happy with their boyfriend. I remember feeling like “why is this not happening for me? When is it my time? Being single is so boring and sad.” When in reality none of these are necessary feelings. Being single has been a blessing. See, during this time of singlehood, I have grown and become the woman that I have always wanted to be strong, hardworking, independent, joyful and sociable. My time is coming for my prince to show up, but I have to truly want this. I believe that with prayer and supplication we can have the desires of our heart but is love what I truly want?

Trials and tribulations

Love is never easy and without problems. I have spoken with many friends and family members who speak on the issues of their relationship. My friends often tell me that nothing is wrong with being single because being with someone is hard work. I used to roll my eyes (sorry guys lol) and think to myself that it’s easy for you to say because your guy is sitting right there. However, the older I get I begin to understand what they mean. Let me explain, I have dated over the years and I realized that in these different relationships that there was usually an issue that I chose to remove myself or the situation faded for a reason. During these times where things weren’t going well, I don’t recall posing for pictures nor wanting to be lovey dovey with the other individual. The reality of the situation is that those happy pictures are not fake but they are a highlight reel of the joyous times. Every couple goes through hard times, but those times are not displayed for the world on social media. It is important to remember that sometimes rejection is God’s protection. When the timing is right, if it is your desire, then your prince charming will come knocking at your door because you already went through losing your glass slipper, and your prince is coming to place it on your foot.


Jasmin Ikard resides in Greenville, NC.


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